Tuesday, November 8, 2011

When You Want to Quit

“Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.” Matthew 10:37

This weekend was another tough one. 11 years now since we held Andrew. Today my husband and I stood over the graves struggling. The rawness of Peter’s loss made it even harder this year.

At one point the comment was made, “These two stones represent 12 and a half years of hell. It makes you wonder why try. Why shouldn’t we just quit and give up with life? We all are just going to die anyway…”

In some ways that comment makes sense. Without any hope, wouldn’t you draw the same conclusion?

But that’s not the conclusion we came to. Instead, we decided…

“We can’t quit because we taught Peter not to quit. How can we do less than we asked him to do? Can giving our best, being our best, be his legacy and how we honor him, his struggle, his perseverance, his courage?”

We also decided…

“We can’t quit because God deserves better than that. If we quit because our boys are gone, that says they are more important than God. Although they mean the world to us, they are not God. To love them more than God is to make them our gods. We won’t do that. God alone is worth serving and worship. To quit is to deny the strength and grace he offers. To quit is to say HE is not worth it. To quit is to refuse the job he still has for us to complete. To quit is not an option.”

So we came home recommitted to God, to each other, to honoring our boys.

We will not quit.
We will wake up each morning.
We will get out of bed.
We will go to work.
We will do the work God has for us each day.

We will persevere with courage, standing on the strength and grace only God can provide.

God deserves no less.
Andrew and Peter deserve no less.

I just wanted you to know….

1 comment:

  1. Hi Juli,

    Andrew's anniversary, and Peter's coming quickly - such heavy days, as are the days that precede them. I'm so sorry.

    But you are right, you guys are not quitters and you live, and Peter lived, with so much courage and determination.

    You are in my thoughts and prayers - Carol